Reactions of parents when you're diagnosed with breast cancer

Parents can find it particularly difficult when they have an adult child diagnosed with cancer. They worry what to say, when to help and when to hold back. They may feel guilty that it is their child who has cancer rather than themselves.

How parents may deal with your diagnosis

For most parents, a child’s diagnosis comes as a shock and they will go through many emotions, including disbelief, fear and sadness.

Some mothers who have had breast cancer themselves say they feel guilty, while others are able to offer good support because they have been through a similar experience.

How your parents deal with your diagnosis will depend on their understanding of cancer and their relationship with you and your family.

Information and support for parents

Parents often find it easier if they have information to understand your diagnosis and treatment to help manage concerns they may have.

Parents may also need suggestions from you about how and when they can best provide practical and emotional support for you and your family.

You or any member of your family can phone BCNA’s Helpline on 1800 500 258 or Cancer Council on 13 11 20 to talk to someone and find out about the support options available.

You may be able to access counselling for family members through hospitals or community health centres, or make an appointment with a private psychologist. Some general cancer support groups welcome partners or other family members. Ask someone from your treating team for options in your area.

Resources

• Podcast: D-Day: Diagnosis Shock - What You Don’t Know Until You Do, with Dr Charlotte Tottman
• Caring for someone with early breast cancer - what to expect and how to help
• You’re important too - looking after yourself as a carer